Being a group of mature adults we like to write secret messages on the bottom of our smoothie bottles and then giggle like children because we've used the word bottom and no-one has told us off. You might have discovered them for yourself, and had a wee chuckle when you did.
Well, we're thinking about adding some new messages to our bottles, and thought you'd like to have a go at writing one. We did the same thing a few years back, which is how Iain's 'trapped in bottle factory, send help' came to be on millions of our little bottles.
The rules are pretty simple - add your suggestion as a comment to this blog post, using no more than 40 characters (including spaces), and we'll pick our favourite (or favourites if there are lots of good ones) on Tuesday 10th January. Next thing you know, you're a published writer, and people around the country are chuckling at your words, throwing money at you and asking you to be godparent to their child and stuff. Such is the power of the hidden message.
We'll also send our favourite entries a shed load of smoothies, of course. Remember - 40 characters, winners picked on Tuesday, enter as many times as you like, guaranteed fortune and fame awaits.
STOP PRESS STOP PRESS STOP PRESS
Or should we say start, as for our first official bit of news for 2012, we are thrilled to announce that our new juice blends are now in the shops.
You can choose from our delicious apple and raspberry recipe or totally tasty tropical (sorry), depending on whether you need to be transported to a dappled orchard or a desert island.
You can find them in ASDA right now and in other shops very soon (we'll keep you posted as to where and when).
Given that at least one person you know will be on some sort of miserable cabbage maple syrup nothing beginning with C diet right now, why not cheer them up with a bit of sunshine in a carafe?
Or better still, give their eyes and ears a treat courtesy of a shady orange grove and the dulcet tones of Captain Jean Luc Picard.
Or even better still, if you fancy winning yourself a case of our new blends, just tell us your top 3 most ridiculous New Year's resolutions below and the 10 that make us laugh the most will each win a case of our new juice.
We'll pick the winners on Friday 20th January, so get your entries in.
Meantime, to find for your nearest ASDA stockist, just email firstname.lastname@example.org
This competition is now closed. Thanks to everyone who entered. Congratulations to Katie B, Kieran W, Karen G, Thom B, Yasna, Andi G, Bex, Kerri W, Samantha S and Steven Y. A box 'o' blends winging their way to you very soon.
We've had the bananaphone in Fruit Towers since Day 1 (even though it went walkies for a few years and was taken hostage along the way too). You can call it whenever you like to ask whatever you like and whilst you might not get the authority on Austrian dirndl techniques, you will always get an answer of some sort and someone jovial to chat to.
And interestingly, it turns out that bananas could end up being phones of the future, thanks to some smart folk over in Japan.
A couple of professors at the University of Tokyo have created a clever augmented reality that can make normal household gubbins into communication devices.
Pizza box into laptop. Pack of cards into an iPod.
And, yes, banana into a telephone
It's called 'invoked computing' and you can read all about how it works here.
We're just chuffed to have been 12 years ahead of science.
Cheerful. Helpful. Limited knowledge of embroidered Alpine fashion