2nd June 2017 // issue #206
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meat-free May
don't bank on it
Monday was our last bank holiday for approximately ages and we're not sure how we feel about it. On one hand, it's a whole extra day for doing loads of really productive stuff that we've been talking about doing for ages/sitting in a pub garden and watching everything on Amazon Prime before our free trial runs out. On the other hand, an extra day can add a kind of pressure to do more with your weekend that finds you panic buying llama trekking experiences and arranging to visit all the niche museums in the local area. However you feel about the upcoming run of two day weekends, spare a thought for the real victims in all of this. The bankers. No more holidays until August? Unsung heroes, the lot of them.
brilliant bananas
 
ripe for the muffin-ing
Bananas. While they were once crowned Britain's favourite food, they've been going through a tough time recently. Research shows that here in Britain we throw away 1.4m edible bananas a day, with a third of people admitting to getting rid of them due to small bruises or marks on the skin. While we know that bananas can be unpredictable fruit bowl customers, there are loads of things you can do with them as they ripen. Like baking banana bread, making a giant stack of banana pancakes or using the skins as props in farcical sketch comedies. For more ideas, have a look here .
the big knit
 
just keep knitting
What do we want? Tiny knitted hats. When do we want them? By the 31st July, if you wouldn't mind. We asked you lot to dust off your knitting needles a while back, and you (and the slightly confused postman) have definitely delivered. We've been blown away by the tiny woollen beauties that have been arriving on our doorstep, but we still need a few more to reach our target. If you've got any knitting stamina left in you, please send your hats to this address or drop them off at your local Age UK store/centre. To everyone who's already knitted – a massive thank you. You're a real purl.
Hi Nina
 
drinker of the week
Last week a lady called Nina travelled all the way down to London from Edinburgh and found herself with a bit of time to kill before catching her train back. She decided to pop in and, while we were giving her a whistle-stop tour of Fruit Towers, we found out that she was a police officer and wondered if she might be able to solve the ongoing case of the disappearing Tupperware (unfortunately the culprit is still at large – contact us if you have any information). We also found out that she really likes reading these newsletters and wanted to surprise her by crowning her this week's finest drinker. Thanks for dropping in, Nina. You were awesome.
the Ryvita case
 
inside Fruit Towers
Last Friday, Heidi didn't have much time for lunch, so she went for something simple – two Ryvita (other crispbreads are available) with Marmite (other yeast extracts are available). She took a hefty bite out of one of them, before placing them carefully on her notepad and running to a meeting. When she returned, they were gone. Which means somebody took the half-eaten Ryvita, bite marks and all. We're not sure who did it, but we're going to find out. Not because we're angry. We just have a lot of questions.
and finally
cool bouncer   good news alert   let the beat drop
 
   
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