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Banana

I've been avoiding this one. It's my favourite, everyone loves them (apart from the people who hate them) and they bend. Yes, it's the banana, post-war freak fruit to your grandparents; staple lunchbox item to us 21st century kids. But what makes the banana tick? Should you wind them up if they stop ticking? Read on and be soothed by our fruit wisdom.........

 

Green bananas - they aren't yellow.

packed with energy

Bananas are great. They are packed with energy and lovely after a strenuous workout/lunch. After an exhausting game of chess, your body loses important vitamins, like B6 and C, as well as minerals like potassium. A banana helps replace these nutrients and helps you maintain your peak performance.

Now you know why great sportsmen, sportswomen and Pete Sampras chomp bananas. Even if you're just rat-racing, bananas can give you the energy to get through an insane day.

It's also proven that low-fat diets rich in vegetables and fruits may reduce the risk of some types of cancer. Viva bananas, life-lengthening bent wonderfruit.

 

banana label collectors

But it's not just sportspeople who swear by bananas. Strange people who get their kicks by watching re-runs of Red Dwarf also love our curved yellow friend.

That's right, banana label collectors. These folk like nothing better than to discover obscure and colourful stickers from around the world, and you can see one of the bigger online collections here.

There is a huge proliferation of sites out there professing love for banana labels. One of their publications is aptly called Please Stop Snickering. Pretty difficult to do when everyone knows that your hobby is banana label collecting. So think about these people the next time you get one of the pesky things stuck between your teeth.

Hazzard's finest. They have never collected banana labels.

 

Lester Piggott, champion jockey, tax evader, but not a Bananarchist.

the Bananarchist

And now it's time to hand over the reins to a fellow fruit enthusiast, The Bananarchist. I would try to describe what this person is like, but fear that justice will only be done if he/she is allowed to speak for him/herself........

"Bananarchy is the destruction, mayhem, and terror brought on by bananas. The Bananarchy Gorilla Warfare Method describes how Bananarchists use explosives and other weapons made out of bananas to wreak havoc upon society, the result being a total collapse of government." The Bananarchist goes on to outline how to make Banana Daiquiri Molotov Cocktails and lots of other things with which to spice up your next dinner party. So remember, in the wrong hands, a banana can be a deadly weapon. Don't slip.

PS The bananarchist's website seems to be no more, so we can't link to it. Sob.