The Oscars. The night we all suddenly find out we have strong opinions about films we've never seen (or have any intention of seeing). The night the words 'glitz & glam' get used on social media more frequently than at any other time of year. Here are our predictions for what might happen on the day:
It will be broadcast on television.
Women will wear clothes that some people like
and others don’t. Their opinions will be made known and this will lead to a
The third Oscar selfie will be taken and,
coincidentally, it will be two thirds less amusing than it was the first time.
97% of the winners will be humbled.
One attendees’ outfit will be worth more than a family
home in Dorset.
The carpet will be referred to as red but, on
screen, it’ll actually look closer to burgundy.
79% of winners wouldn’t have been able to do it
without their fans and will be incredibly thankful for their support.
Men will wear suits and no one will have
anything further to say about them.
45% of winners will hold their award in the air
and say “wow”.
teeth will be a shade of white we didn’t think was achievable for human
of the results will be mildly surprising and people will express their mild surprise
on social media.
you’re watching it with someone else they’ll say “I had a feeling that one would
win it” despite what they said half an hour before.
clothes that a famous person is wearing will sell out in ‘seconds’ during the
will sing at some point.
host will divide opinion and different news outlets will have different takes
on how offensive they actually were.
will win the Oscar/won’t win the Oscar and Twitter will make a year’s worth of
profits off the back of it.
will win the Oscar/won’t win the Oscar and Buzzfeed will create a number of GIF
based articles to replay the moment that he did/didn’t win the Oscar.
camera will pan to a celebrity looking bored and they will quickly change their
expression when they realise they’re being filmed.
of winners “just didn’t expect this”.
whole thing will go on for a bit too long. You might go to bed before the end
or turn over to watch the news.