A couple of weeks ago we won a Target Jobs award by being voted 'the most popular company graduates would like to work for in the consumer goods category'. Our Jojo (the one being restrained by the lady in the blue), Caz (the one wearing a look of surprise), and Lena (the little one in the black looking relatively normal) went to the awards ceremony to receive a nice shiny trophy and a firm handshake from David Walliams (the one who looks like he'd rather be somewhere else) and a round of applause. If you're a graduate who voted for us - thanks very much, we're chuffed to have won.
In the UK we throw away 26,000 slices of bread every single minute. On top of that, we chuck away another 2500 slices worth of the bits that not everyone likes, such as the crusts (or heels, ends or butts as they're called in some parts of the country). It's total madness, and it could be avoided if only we planned what we ate better or made more use of the freezer.
After digging a bit deeper into the problem, we discovered that crusts were getting a raw deal at Fruit Towers too.
Every week, about 60 crusts are left abandoned in the bread bins or on worktops with bits cruelly ripped off them. They're left to go stale and mouldy with noone to care for them, all because we prefer their thinner, better looking friends.
So then Tim, one of our office angels, is forced to send them to the big compost heap in the sky, which makes him very unhappy indeed.
But it doesn't have to be this way. After all, not eating the crusts is a bit like refusing to talk to someone because they've got three arms. It's just a bit of extra bread and if anything, should be considered a bonus. And as Conor says, they're great with soup.
Kirsty can't get enough of them either, and here she is demonstrating how to make your crusts toaster-safe by either patting them down for a nice, dense hit of bread, or by carefully slicing a bit off (which makes the perfect snack to eat while you wait for the main event).
So hopefully, in the coming weeks, we can find a place for crusts in our hearts and on our plates, just like Janel and Jeremy have.
We've been writing all the phrases that make a piece of us die inside when we hear them on the wall.
Alison M told her husband about the wall the other night, and his contribution made ours seem rather lame:
"If your transitional activities have hit quick sand, take a helicopter view to create a paradigm shift while capitalising on your data, it is only then that you can climb that mountain called success."
Oh to be on that mountain of success. The place where dreams are made.
While you're all recovering from the shock revelation that we're not really making a mangoes and marmite smoothie, we thought it only fair to tell you how the prank came about. After all, as many celebrities and politicians know, a lie isn't a proper lie if you've got an explanation for it.
It all started back in February when we found ourselves watching the Super Bowl and trying to work out what the heck was going on. In a (mostly made-up) tweet about the rules, we said that the marks under the players’ eyes were probably Marmite. The people at Marmite agreed, and a relationship was born. Then our followers suggested we make a Marmite smoothie, and we decided to throw caution to the wind and give it a go.
We set Fliss from our products team the challenge of adding a dollop of Marmite to one of our classic recipes, and although she was reluctant at first, her dedication to making great tasting drinks meant that we ended up with something that wasn't completely vile. Most people would agree that it looked better than it tasted though, and for that we have Clare from our design team to thank.
We even got the lads from Sorted Food involved, and they kindly popped in to Fruit Towers and whipped up a mango panna cotta with Marmite tuiles. Yum.
Thanks a lot for being such good sports and allowing us to have a bit of fun. We fooled more of you than we expected, including one of our suppliers who called us to ask for the recipe breakdown so they could enter it into their system, and a lady from Japan who was trying to understand what an earth an April Fool was, and wanted us to send her our new smoothie.
For those of you who are disappointed, feel free to have a go yourself. Just add 7g of marmite to 250ml of our mangoes and passion fruits smoothie, whisk as though your life depended on it, take a sip and enjoy/recoil/spit it out into the sink.